Step 11: Think Twice. Be an Agent of Racial Change.

Now for the grand finale! This is the simplest yet most important bullet, and so I’ve saved it for last.

Over the last few weeks we’ve dug into a bunch of different concepts and actions we can take to be “a part of the solution” for black citizens. Some of them require introspection and self-education. Others require engaging in uncomfortable conversations and more closely examining the people in our orbit who wittingly or unwittingly contribute to the continuation of systemic racism. All of them, however, require a willingness to confront and shift our paradigms and push forward from the status quo. An underlying theme of all of these steps is that they require us to use critical thinking.

To drill home this point, let’s circle back to the catalyst for this conversation, the death of George Floyd. As the outrage over his murder starts to dissipate, the loud politicization and division over this topic takes to the forefront. In a society capable of even politicizing the core science of safety in the middle of a pandemic, it was perhaps inevitable that the spark of unifying outrage would devolve into division. We need our critical thinking skills now more than ever.

I’m asking that none of us succumb to the cheap politicization of black lives. Yes, we will certainly need the mechanisms of government to issue new policies, new laws, and new approaches. But we need to thread the needle and avoid the theater of politics. Cable news and other partisan news outlets so often conflate reporting on current events with the theatrical nature of storytelling. It’s entertaining for sure, and I myself spend a fair amount of time basking in the cathartic light of hearing my political suspicions confirmed, my opinions validated, and my favorite narratives spun in a fantastical way by beautiful people using all of the words I like. The problem with this though, is that when our partisan ideals are stirred in this way, we walk through the world with a clear sense of protagonists and antagonists. We are lead to believe Utopia is waiting for us on the other side, if only ‘those antagonists’ would get out of the way. Narratives like these are remarkably dangerous. Because right now, for half the country, the antagonists are framed as ‘the evil police’, and for the other half, the antagonists are framed as ‘the black lives matter crowd and thugs supporting them.’ All partisan news outlets, in their own way, in effect deepen this tale of black vs. blue. In a country where we will never get rid of blue, no matter how much we defund It, and never get rid of black, no matter how much we imprison it, we create a collision course for more problems.

So please, right now, think critically, and as the title of this post suggests, when it comes to being confronted with information, think twice about it. Don’t accept anything at face value. As a liberal, I still refuse to accept variations on the “ACAB” (All Cops are Bad) narrative, because they’re not. I refuse to say “Defund the Police” because as much as I support the key changes that can evolve the way we protect all of citizens, there is no good-will built in a phrase that reflexively threatens the livelihood of those sworn to protect and serve. Likewise, I call on my conservative brethren to reject narratives that show looting as the primary accomplishment and action of those who’ve been out protesting injustice. I call on them to reject the All Lives Matter rhetoric, and I beg for their sensitivities at this flashpoint in our society.

So the last point is just this: Think Twice. When you are in a position to provide an opportunity to someone out of your own network of people who primarily think, act, or look like you, think twice. When you hear a racially charged news story that breaks your heart and fills you with rage - dig into it further, and think twice about it. When you’re channel surfing and picking what to watch with your family this weekend on netflix and you can choose between The Green Book or Tiger King, think twice.

I, and the people who look like me, need all of you to help push us to a place where we feel safer in this country we love.

Thank you everyone who has taken the time to read these posts, and I want to leave you with some thoughts I expressed in a comment last week, that highlight the personal gravity and importance of this topic, and why I am calling on all of you, regardless of anything you have thought before, to help out:

My American Dream:

While I'm far from perfect, each day, I do my best to be a good person. I try to be good to my friends, I try to be helpful to my wife, I try to look out for my family. I've worked extremely hard, I've gone to the best school I possibly could, I try to obey as many laws as the next guy -- in short I've done everything in my power to live "The American Dream."

Let me tell you about my American Dream. My American Dream includes making sure I never leave my house without my ID incase I'm stopped and asked who I am and what I'm doing wherever I am. My American Dream includes wearing the least offensive clothes possible when I leave the home -- I'll point out that since my teens, and especially since Trayvon's murder, the statistical chances of you seeing me wearing a hoodie are extremely low. My American Dream includes being hyper aware of my actions and tone at all times, and when in public doing my best to not bring too much attention to myself, or act in any way that might cause offense or unfounded fear in the mind of white bystanders. I won't even laugh loudly in an unfamiliar place. My American Dream includes a quick flashing moment of sheer terror at the sight of an unfamiliar police officer, even if it's just in a Starbucks, until they either pass, or smile, or give some other nod or acknowledgement of our shared humanity.

My American Dream involves carefully selecting where I vacation with my wife like we're in The Green Book, making sure to vet any location for its proximity to a liberal-minded or welcoming community. My American dream includes making sure that any medical appointment includes me repeating any symptoms I have ad nauseam to the doctor to make sure they hear me, as extensive research has shown how often black patients are ignored, or presumed to be fabricating or exaggerating their pain or discomfort.

My American Dream includes a daily sigh of relief that I don't have a black child to worry about in this country, as I swear to you on all that is Holy to me that I would do everything in my power to make sure that child approached life here with the same caution I do. Because that’s the type of caution that so far, has gotten me home safely each night.

I don't need you to agree with me on the definition of racism. I don't need you to agree with me on root causes. I don't need you to see the world the way I do. I don't need you to validate my experience, because I live it.

If you have a vested interest in me and the people who look like me having a better experience, please pick up a fire hose. The house is on fire.

Step 10: Separate Idolatry from Patriotism

“This idea of purity and you’re never compromised and you’re always politically ‘woke’ and all that stuff, you should get over that quickly. The world is messy; there are ambiguities… People who do really good stuff have flaws. People who you are fighting may love their kids, and share certain things with you.” - Barack Obama, 10/29/19

I’ll get back to that quote in a moment…

So we’re down to the last two key steps in this plan to extract racism (to the best of our ability) from our daily lives. Today, I don’t intend to get biblical, but I do want to talk about the negative impact of Idolatry. When I drafted the blueprint for this series a couple weeks ago, I had no idea how timely *this* step would be, as it was before we saw so much movement around taking down statues and paintings (both at the governmental and criminal level), before a re-ignited conversation around removing the confederate flag in even more places, and of course, before we said goodbye to Aunt Jemima and Uncle Ben.

And all of those changes feel pretty darn good, but we’re not out of the woods yet. For instance, just when I thought it was safe to maybe trek down to Talladega and try one of those “Krispy Kreme Burgers”, we learned that the ONE black driver who championed the removal of the Confederate Flag found a noose in his locker this week. That’s correct (and maybe a smidge ironic) someone decided to take a stance to defend THAT flag (a symbol often dismissed as “heritage not hate” by its supporters) with a NOOSE (a symbol representative of “pure unadulterated hate”). Yep.

Why do we keep ending up in these situations where there is a political debate over when it’s time to just let something like a flag, or a “graven image” go into the pile of history, but out of our daily view? I believe that the best thing we can do as citizens is to double down on our emotional attachment to the Constitution and the documents that frame the ideals of the American Experiment, and to start to distance ourselves from our canonization of the people who helped create them and shape our journey from there to here.

Admittedly, this crosses into a political conversation, and to the best of my ability I’ve tried to keep these suggestions as apolitical as possible. Really. Each day, I’ve been doing my best to scan conservative media as well as the Facebook walls of some of my most conservative friends in tandem with drafting these posts to ensure I’m presenting a way forward that could theoretically appeal to anyone interested in progress for black skin, regardless of who they intend to vote for in November.

In this particular investigation, I’ve learned a few things. We see an underlying belief on the right that our Founding Fathers are ‘untouchable’. We also see a romanticism of symbols and figures of hate and oppression, and a deep admiration for people who fought on the wrong side of the Civil War. It can end up feeling like anyone with a white face, a jacket denoting military involvement (regardless of which side they fought on), and preferably a beard --- should be shielded from critique and are as worthy of our unadulterated praise and gratitude as modern-day Beyonce. An undying loyalty to those leaders and figures who came before is then conflated with patriotism. This is a dangerous form of Idolatry. When this type of worship is connected to patriotism, there can ‘be no wrong,’ in our reflections on their ‘Sainthood’ and our collective inability to live with cognitive dissonance means our brains swoop in to clean up the mess. Thus, the defenders of those leaders’ most unsavory actions make ridiculous sounding assertions -- for example, ownership of slaves is often forgiven readily, dismissed as an anachronistic mistake like owning Bell Bottoms or Pet Rocks. “But Everyone else was doing it at the time!” becomes a common refrain.

I’ll do my best now to deploy the non-binary thinking I preached about last week: While slavery was most certainly an atrocity I’m not sure we’ll ever erase the stains of, I’m not saying that slavery disqualifies the important work done by our Founding Fathers. I’m just suggesting maybe we don’t need so many statues of them. (Let the record show, however, I am suggesting without reservation that we don’t need a single statue of a confederate leader.) In an admittedly interesting speech by conservative lightning rod Ben Shapiro, he suggested the US was founded on Freedom and not Slavery, and brought attention to an often ignored portion of the “I Have A Dream” speech, when MLK Jr. said “When the architects of our republic wrote the magnificent words of the Constitution and the declaration of Independence, they were signing a promissory note to which every American was to fall heir.” It has been argued, by historians more qualified than me, that the constitution was written with the goal of one day truly living up to the promise of equality even if it could not be realized then. The ideals of the American Experiment are one of the few lights at the end of the tunnel on dark days in this nation when you have black skin. There’s beauty to the idea that as citizens we’ve all agreed to unite around a Constitution that shines as a beacon around the globe and promises us we can do better.

I included the Obama quote at the very top to ground myself in writing this step for discussion. Less tone-deaf than the ill-timed “Good People On Both Sides” argument of our current President, it still gets at the underlying idea that it is possible to be a good person and have wildly different views on a variety of things. Any binary claims as to the greatness of a person (unless it’s Beyonce) are inherently flawed because humans are flawed. We are now, we were yesterday, and we will be tomorrow. So, as much as we may love Lincoln for freeing the Slaves, as much as we may love Obama for breaking a seemingly unimaginable racial barrier, it doesn’t behoove us to worship these people. We teach our children to revere many of our previous leaders, and that is an irresponsible way to build allegiance, to build patriotism. It’s more important that children learn the reasons to love the Gettysburg Address or Obama’s “No Red or Blue America” DNC speech of 2004. Yes, let’s learn about the people who got us where we are, but our gratitude for their humanity doesn’t require worship. It doesn’t require statues. We can channel that love and gratitude into engaging with the things they did right, learning from the things we did wrong, and time and time again, coming back to the ideals of the American Experiment that bond us all.

Step 9: Welcome Checks and Balances

Welcome back! Apologies to anyone who was looking for my posts the last couple days, I took some much needed time to regroup and engage with some of the comments and previous posts, but let’s hop back in - don’t worry, we’re only three posts away from curing racism! :)

So today, let’s talk about Step 9: Welcome Checks and Balances

The other day in Step 5, I took a quick tongue-in-cheek detour where I suggested those desiring to be agents of racial change should leverage some of the “Greatest Hits” of racial oppression from the last few decades, and flip them back at the institutions where systemic racism experiences the most room to flourish. But since the last time I’ve posted, I’ve watched and cringed as countless ‘good folks’ continue to post “All Lives Matter,” I’ve seen a tone-deaf and reactionary march scheduled here to celebrate local law enforcement, I’ve re-watched “Black Panther (the marvel movie, not the documentary),” I watched “The Banker” on Apple TV for the first time (great movie!), I became more aware of the gross and probably nefarious delays in freedom attached to the true story of Juneteenth, I’ve reflected in comments and conversations on my own experience with the compromises black Americans make with the American Dream, and I’ve watched the leader of the free world continue his march into the history books with a deeply divisive and dangerous rally, doubling down on an ‘us vs. them’ narrative and touting outright racist sentiments like referring to this pandemic as The Kung Flu.

So, playtime is over. Now I’m not saying this jokingly. I stand by all of these ideas and will flesh them out as a map for the more interesting hike here, the march towards American Equality. While these are a step away from the “actions of the individual” approach to this list so far, it’s rooted in the idea that we should all welcome checks and balances in our organizations and workplaces. We should all be ready to endure the thorough examination required to cleanse ourselves of this national stain of racially-driven inequality, anywhere it might live. Let’s Go:

Policy Suggestion 1 (A reimagining of Stop & Frisk): Instead of authorizing the over-policing black and brown skin, Policy 1 would authorize random audits of racial equity in American businesses and institutions. It could look like a federal group that swoops in like the IRS or a Health Inspector (but with cool unnecessarily militarized outfits just to make everyone uncomfortable!) to adjudicate equality. I love to name things, so for the sake of conversation, let’s give them a fun name….let’s call them CARE Agents (Commission for American Racial Equality). They’d get immediate access to the Human Resources records and thus would have full transparency into salary disparities, hiring statistics, and complaints from employees. Employees from underrepresented minorities as well as their supervisors could be interviewed by CARE Agents on their perspectives on the corporate culture and all employees could fill out a rubric that grades the business on key metrics. If the business passes, they’re good to go. Mind you, that business doesn’t earn a gold medal, they just keep fighting the good fight. If they don’t pass, swift and meaningful action could be taken, not limited to fines or criminal charges.

Policy Suggestion 2 (A reimagining of “Broken Windows”): My good friend Wikipedia defines Broken Windows theory as the following: “A criminological theory that states that visible signs of crime, anti-social behavior, and civil disorder create an urban environment that encourages further crime and disorder, including serious crimes.” So what could a reimagining of this look like? Easy! Let’s get our MAD LIBS on, think about organizations instead of cities, and ‘culture and equality’ instead of crime and BING BANG BOOM we have a new policy - a theory that posits: Visible signs of RACIAL INEQUITY create an ORGANIZATIONAL CULTURE that encourages further RACIAL INEQUITY.

So this would mean if you have a company where the board, leadership, or staff, appear to reflect inequity, it is enough of a reason for us to dig in further. Cue the well-dressed CARE agency I outlined in Policy Suggestion 1. Likewise, this bureau can monitor the public statements of an organization and even smaller complaints and concerns of BIPOC employees or customers. After all, as we know, where there’s smoke, there can be fire.

Policy Suggestion 3 (A reimagining of “Three Strikes” laws): If we were to re-tool the bones of Three Strikes policies for the goal of equality, we would again bring in our awesome new federal agency that actually pays close attention to inequities. They would adjudicate the grievances reported or inequities observed in businesses, schools, even governmental departments, and take action. After three serious “strikes”, the agency would have the latitude to take big actions including serious fines, temporary or even permanent closures.

Yes, these three ideas are over-simplifications but the underlying goal of each is valid. This isn't a passive aggressive exercise in 'punishing the sins of the father' - it's proactive action with zero-tolerance for conscious inequity. If we want real progress, we need a society willing to actually police itself when it comes to systemic racism, and willing to take meaningful action when we find we’re missing the mark. The ability to apply stricter punishments, that can have a direct impact on both gainful employment of individuals and the overall survival of a business or organization sends the message that we’re no longer playing around. We’re no longer trying to score political points with platitudes, and we’re no longer willing to look away. We are out of cheeks to turn.

A reflex many of you might feel when reading this is the question “How would a business really combat something like a board of all white members, or a staff of racially skewed employees?” This is a fair question. Something for us to talk through for sure. But I think similar to how American Idol has made us collectively better judges of when a stranger is singing out-of-tune, the events of the last few years have made us better judges of when corporate or institutional behavior and leadership structure is not in the spirit of an equal America. We can figure this out. To be better and more informed participants in this dialogue, I think we all could use a refresher course in programs like Affirmative Action which are even today, dismissed, looked down on, cringed at, or deeply misunderstood by many conservatives and liberals alike (liberals are just more likely to use their indoor voice when doing the dismissing.) If anyone has great resources on this, please feel free to link to them below!

My posts so far have focused on finding a common ground to talk with people of any political perspective about race. To forgive past wrongs, to increase current consciousness, to create better outcomes for tomorrow. I'm still there, but please know that is not a vision absent of awareness or experience with the conscious bad actors, or in any way accepting of the status quo as the end of the arc to justice. In conclusion on this step, the more policy and infrastructure we can create as a country to prohibit willful misdeeds, the more we will encourage people to “Think Twice” when they are making decisions that can negatively impact and continue the unequal representation and disparate experiences of black citizens.

Back soon for Step 10: Separate Idolatry from Patriotism

Step 8: Use Your Imagination: We Are All Ready for Something New

Good afternoon and welcome back to 11 Things You Can Do RIGHT NOW to Improve The Obstacle of Race in America! Today I want to talk about the importance of letting our minds wander when it comes to solutions for American racial inequality.

We’re confronted with the gargantuan task of solving a problem baked into the infrastructure of our country, that has been approached by some of the best minds, and still, here we are. While we’re fortunate to have the writings of visionaries, the research of scholars, and the speeches of leaders as benchmarks of where we’ve been and where we’re going, the advent of technology has opened up a channel that flows faster than any river, and is only limited by the speed of your wi-fi: Crowdsourcing. I believe that the best solutions to this problem won’t come from our establishment, because unlike what Tim Scott said this morning about our country not being racist, but having racism in it, I think it is “in” our establishment. It is in our country’s DNA. But I *also* believe most all of our better angels have been begging us to unravel that “establishment” for some time.

The best example of how we, on both sides of the aisle, are truly ready to dismantle the unpleasantries of the establishment is a quick look back at the last decade in the White House. Sorry, but here’s a quick but necessary detour into politics:

While some people may think that we have a system where racism is so ingrained that it's directly to “blame” for the presidency of Donald Trump, I want to pause that narrative for just a moment. As I’ve pointed out a couple times in this series, so many people who voted for Donald Trump in 2016 also voted for Barack Obama in 2008 or 2012. I’ve been grappling with this reality for days and really for years. How, in a moment when racial animus has reached a fever pitch, where we see so many of our neighbors conflate flag-toting patriotism with MAGA hats, xenophobia and “deplorable” ideas can they have voted for a black president. TWICE? My synopsis is that they never really “cared” about race. They didn’t then, they don’t now. They Just. Don’t. Care. The group of citizens that crossed over party and racial lines, wanted change. They saw an establishment that wasn’t working for them or their families, and they wanted the guy who visually or rhetorically was the furthest thing from a traditional embodiment of the establishment. Call it Pollyanna if you wish, but I believe those of us interested in a new vision of the establishment can leverage the discontent of so many of those voters to become great allies in this push forward.

First, for those doubting my optimism and claims of non-malicious racial intent by our brothers and sisters on the right, let’s dig in a bit more. This conclusion compliments a few themes from this little series of actionable vignettes. First off, Step 1’s look at weaponized words on race: It’s hard to define yourself as a racist or engage with that accusation of being one if you just don’t care about race. Perhaps that’s what people mean when they’ve deftly postulated “I Don’t See Race” or “I’m Colorblind.” That is their way of saying they don’t care about race. A few years ago we could accept this viewpoint as an allyship to the cause, but we know now, through the writings of authors like Ibram X. Kendi in his book “How to Be an Anti-Racist” that active racism and passive racial apathy are closely aligned in the ongoing saga of White Supremacy. If we think about yesterday’s Step 7 and the quick examination of inequality, one of the main points was “inequality thrives when we are ignorant to or shielded from its existence.” So here, we’ve had the perfect storm of ignorance (either through limited exposure or conscious ostrich-like behavior) and apathy which in summation allows racial inequality to flourish.

As a quick wave of editorial optimism, I want to highlight I’m encouraged by this pre-existing condition of Racial Apathy. Why? Because it’s going away. While racism has been an inextricable part of the American Experiment thus far, I do believe the majority of our citizens are open to change when they see change is here. Whether it’s from a place of deep personal experience with oppression or simply the wind gusts of popularity that inspire a fairweather sports fan, people like to feel like they’re on the right side of history. Like Covid in February, white supremacy has been left to float unchecked in American air, for generations, with only a few key moments of nation-wide intervention: Well, here is our moment of intervention.

So back to where we started: Today’s step is to use your imagination. You. Me. All of us. Trump Voters, Biden Voters, everyone. Let’s crowdsource the future of race in America. Your task, which might sound like Disney Movie level simplicity, is to come up with ONE idea, big or small, that you think would improve race in America. You don’t even have to come up with it, it can be an idea you’ve heard that resonated with you. But I want you to take that one idea and shop it around. Talk about it with your spouse, your friends, that cool co-worker who won’t call HR to complain about your annoying and incessant enthusiasm for your new-found social mission. But talk about it. Again, this might sound overly optimistic, but when we go back to the Butterfly Effect we talked about yesterday, we all know the impact of one idea or one action. So imagine if everyone who reads this takes one idea, new or old, and becomes a champion of that idea. The worst case scenario is that some of those ideas will be TERRIBLE, and will be challenged by those you shop it around with. In that event, you’ll learn why people don’t love the idea, and you’ll grow from it. Best case scenario? That idea catches on like wildfire, and a day or week or year from now, we’re back here talking about how you helped cure racism. Pretty cool, right?

Step 7: Inequality is Inequality

Today, I want to talk about inequality, but separate from our dialogue on race. I’m splitting this out because, when it comes to our personal feelings on racial inequality in America, there are many things both conscious and unconscious that influence our views. As such, we approach conversations with each other armed with ideas we’ve learned from our parents, things we’ve learned from media consumption, things we learned from our friends, our own personal experiences and more.

Likewise, not only do our views come from so many places, but when we try to engage in “fixing” racial inequality, we discover that it lives in SO many places. Like our favorite character from the Where’s Waldo books, racism hides pretty much... anywhere. In courtrooms and traffic stops, classrooms, loan offices, Senate chambers, voting booths, malls…anywhere.

So we end up with a heaping mixture of societal ills in an already full cauldron of complex personal perspectives. It can feel so weighty and so complex that we often freeze or walk away, unsure of where we stand, unsure of what the answers are, and unable to truly move forward.

It’s important that if we intend to embark on a journey of real racial progress, we center ourselves around how *any* humans should be treated. Step 7 is a healthy time to take a step back and really examine our personal tolerance for inequality, wherever it may roam. While it’s hard for most of us to imagine a solid justification for slavery existing today, most of us have a tolerance for inequality in ways both seemingly big and small. Most of us didn’t push too hard against the socioeconomic boundaries created by a culture where unpaid internships were a primary gateway to gainful employment in many lucrative careers. We don’t ask too many questions about where our iPhones really come from, we’re just starting as a society to challenge the abuses (let alone the waste) of fast fashion, and we embrace the all-access joys of platforms like Spotify without too much concern for the compensation of the persons who created that one song we keep listening to over and over.

Why are we collectively (mostly) okay with these things? Simply put, inequality thrives when we are ignorant to or shielded from its existence. If we’re not about to be an intern, we’re not thinking about the economic impact of internships. If we’re not in the Foxconn Factory in China, we’re not consumed with thoughts of the harsh living conditions and demands of that campus. If you’re not a songwriter charged with putting food on the table, the struggle may be real, but it’s not your own.

As I’ve previously addressed, I recognize we are inundated with so very much information on a daily basis. No one, including me, would suggest now is the time to abandon ship and embark on the quest of being a global social justice warrior, striving to un-wrong every evil of the world. We know that isn’t feasible and I’m certain that even if we tried, after less than a week, we’d have trouble getting out of bed in the morning. I’m sharing these examples for the sake of context. We must dismiss our naïveté. We, as individuals, just like our ancestors did, and just like our children will, have the innate ability to tolerate huge amounts of injustice and inequality. The question is, what do we do about it?

We take baby steps.

2020 is a shocking example of the power of the Butterfly Effect, whether it’s one poor culinary choice in China, or one Black man in Minneapolis. So why can’t we harness the power of the butterfly effect for some good? We will never know everything wrong that happens in the world, but we can open our eyes to the bad things that happen right in front of us, and develop the personal goal to take small actions to offset those ills.

Admittedly, one problem I don’t have a solution for is that our nation, separate from being irrefutably built on a belief in white supremacy, was economically built on free labor, and we’ve never really come up with a way to move away from that model. Our successes and growth are too often inextricably linked to the hardships of someone else. But maybe the “baby steps” model can apply here too - for instance if you're an employer and you’re hiring an outsourced offshore workforce, you can involve yourself in the humanity and concerns of those employees as if they were right here in the “Good Ol’ U S of A.”

The new national calls for justice after George Floyd, this “once in a generation” movement towards racial equality, specifically for Black Americans, is beautiful and I want it to continue. I want it to be long-lasting. But we know, one day, the protesters will go home. Some changes will have been made, while others will still need our attention.

I believe we only continue this march forward over the long term if we can metaphorically walk and chew gum at the same time. If while we are actively holding this singular outrage, this pain, and this desire for something better, we also latch on to a desire for a higher, wider, broader equality at the same time. That duality will positively inform our actions both big and small in the months and years to come.

See you again tomorrow for Step 8: Use Your Imagination!

“The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice.” - Martin Luther King Jr.

Step 6.5: Watch 13th on Netflix. Today.

Like the exhausted school teacher who wheels in the television and VCR to show a movie (showing my age with that reference I'm sure), I am tired y'all.

I'm taking a day off of posting to really catch my bearings, re-center my thinking, and give all of you interested in real solutions to inequality a chance to better understand one of the cornerstone, underlying issues driving that inequality. As presented by some of the finest thinkers our nation has on race.

We watched 13th last night, and even as a black man who has illusions of being "informed" I will never look at the relationship America has had with her black citizens the same way again.

If you've watched it, please feel free to share some thoughts below. If you haven't watched it yet, or are "planning to get around to it soon" please move it up on your queue.

Tomorrow we're back for Step 7: Inequality is Inequality

Step 6: Consume Black Media

No need to wax-poetic on this one, it’s straight forward. If you have Netflix or Apple TV or other streaming services, most of them are literally trying to shove you in the direction of black cinema or television this week. So watch some. Engage with the heart-wrenching documentaries outlining the lineage of injustice experienced by black Americans of all walks of life AND watch a feel good movie (like Hidden Figures - still my favorite movie to recommend to anyone looking to learn and grow on a day where they don’t have the stomach for harder documentaries) - but watch SOMEthing. I personally love shows like Black-ish or even edgier shows like Black AF on Netflix. I’ve heard great things about Atlanta and Insecure, and assure you they’re on my list to tackle as well.

My hope isn’t that you’ll love these shows or even watch the entire seasons. My hope is that you will grow by engaging with the trials and tribulations of black protagonists, and understand some of the nuances of their journey.

Without at all diving into the larger cultural conversations about the legacy and horrors of Bill Cosby, I will say this: America was a better place for black people when the most popular show on television was a portrayal of a successful black family - with a lawyer and a doctor as parents, in a household where education was paramount and college was an expectation, not a surprise occurrence. That show did more to push racial quality forward than having our first Black President. Kids like me, interested in hard-work, violin, and other pursuits often presumed to be reserve for the white child, suffered fewer claims of “acting white” in those golden years of television. (I promise you, those claims returned when black excellence was replaced on prime time television with caricatures like Carlton on The Fresh Prince or Steve Urkel on Family Matters.) With the Cosby Show and it’s spin-offs we finally had a national portrayal of black folks, revelatory in their heritage, and plugged into a wider and diverse cultural landscape. It felt to be special and yet most importantly was portrayed to be perfectly ordinary.

One of my biggest soapboxes in my life, sincerely not being hyperbolic here, is that increased media portrayals of black life, black promise, and black humanity will be the cornerstone of building a nation where we don’t as a reflex see black youth in long white t-shirts as felons in training, where we don’t bat an eye at the peculiar black child eagerly asking for an extra credit assignment, where we don’t make as many limited assumptions about the life experience of the black citizens we encounter. While I think there are miles to go on this front, so much progress has been made. Black media is out there, so go dive in!

Watch and ask yourself questions. Not all of it is good or great, and I won’t suggest that just because black skin played a role in its creation you should love it. But watch it. Be conscious of stereotypes portrayed, dive into the life experience of the protagonists and antagonists alike, and unlike the real challenging work of some of the other steps, have some fun with this one!

Step 5: Diversify Your News Consumption

Good morning! Today’s bullet is relatively short, which is good because I have limited time today, but I wanted to add some clarifying thoughts on yesterday’s post (Step 4) on Cancel Culture. While I stand carefully by the seven steps I shared for “challenging” those in an unwanted racially-charged spotlight, I want to highlight when I think it is best to “challenge” and when the more urgent “cancel” is truly appropriate.

First off, I had initially promised to dive into my concerns over reflexive behavior, as it relates to individuals and companies, and gave some examples of people and organizations over the years who’ve been cancelled by fans or larger society.

Let’s hop in the time machine and go back to 2013 - let’s talk about Paula Deen.

Do you remember why she was cancelled? Most people will say it’s because she used the N-word. In my effort to continue to de-weaponize words on race, we have to stop our attachment to getting rid of people over the use of slurs like that. This is controversial I know, but use of an offensive word is a overly-simple and reflexive reason to remove or cancel someone in power. With Paula, investigation showed a history of discriminatory and disturbing racially- charged behavior. A black employee reported she was asked to dress in an “Aunt Jemima-style outfit and have her ring a bell when food was ready.” That - my friends- is more than enough reason to cancel someone.

Instead of vilifying over the surface language, we should view one’s relationship to their power and the decisions they've made in hiring, firing, or other areas where their discrimination could have real impact or influence, then we should decide on that account. My fear is that when we “cancel” in these reflexive ways, the underlying behavior is not identified, subjected to public scrutiny, and is allowed to continue behind the shadows.

So how do we do this? I think in an effort to right the wrongs of the last several hundred years, we utilize some of the exact same tactics utilized by those with a vested interest in maintaining the status quo and holding down black skin. Remember ‘broken windows’ policing? Where those who committed small crimes were presumed to be on an inescapable path to destruction and bigger crime? That disproportionately resulted in negative lasting outcomes for black and brown skin? Let’s use that tactic! Let’s launch a federal or third-party bureau that observes public language of an organization and the smaller complaints and concerns of BIPOC employees or customers. Remember “Three Strikes” laws? Let’s use those too. Three strikes to your company for grievances against customers and employees of color, for corporate misdeeds around hiring or salaries or promotions, and you’re done. Fines, disbanding, a federal mark of disapproval that alerts potential customers to your conscious discrimination, anything. But you’re done. And my favorite - stop and frisk? Love it, let’s do that one too. Let’s bring in random adjudication of your corporate practices and if they don’t jive, then goodbye!

With practices like this, rather than using concerning language or behavior as an excuse to “cancel” (which in the case of a Starbucks will only last as long as we remember, which, is not very long, especially when caffeine deprivation is involved) we use it as a reason to investigate -- just like how police often use traffic stops. It tunes us in to that fact that something may be off, and creates an opportunity to audit and investigate the culture around the person and their organizations.

It allows us to stop waiting for extreme evidence of racial bias to take meaningful action. Remember when liberal media was soooo excited when they thought there might be audio of Trump using the "N-word" like that was going to the "final straw" that brought people awareness of his racist intentions and behavior? That type of wishing (and that simplistic of a crystalized definition of racist intent) makes all of us lazy reactionaries. Without revising this perspective we’re doomed to continue our culture with a high pain-tolerance for inequality. The amount of discriminatory and horrible behavior we tolerate from people who don't use the words we find on the surface to be offensive earns a badge of hypocrisy for almost all of us.

Secondly, I want to talk about when we should skip the protocol, and use the powers invested in us to cancel people or companies. It is my view, that we should unequivocally take swift action to remove those in direct positions of gatekeeping (as discussed in Step 3 )

Let me say this as straight-forward as possible: In the event that clear, willful and conscious, racially-biased behavior and views are identified in a gatekeeper, that person should be removed from their position swiftly and without apology.

Not a personal anecdote, but a timely and local one: There is current uproar in Brewster NY over a school board member who has been accused of racism. She (allegedly - I’m no lawyer but you know..the law) posted conspiracy theories on her social media pages on George Floyd’s murder being staged, and extreme criticism of protestors. While I don’t know if the protester conflict is grounds for termination, the George Floyd remarks, in my opinion are. In my efforts to bring awareness to and consider ways to bring as many people to the table for change as possible, I have no patience or tolerance for conscious bias in a gatekeeper. While not a parent myself, I am horrified by the idea of young, beautiful, black minds being in anyway shaped by people who’ve consciously and unapologetically prescribed to a culture that views their life and their potential as “less than.” Get. Them. Out.

 So here we go:

Step 5: Diversify Your News Consumption

This one is simple. Whether you prescribe to the belief that you should keep your friends close and your enemies closer, or you just want to know what the other side is thinking, at least once a week, I highly suggest you dip your toe in the media of the “enemy camp.” No matter how much you hate it, Fox News and MSNBC are highly watched and highly consumed. They are shaped by the thinking of a large group of citizens, but on a deeper level, I think they shape the thinking of those demographics. So, if you “can’t understand why on earth” someone voted for Trump - you’re doing it wrong. Stop by, and look to see what is being reported and what’s not being reported. You may learn something, you will probably be angry for a minute, but we’re not moving forward to fix anything if we don’t at least get why someone is entrenched in their stance. Regardless of the underlying racial biases baked into the cake of this nation, I am a believer we’re all fundamentally seeking what we think is in the best interest of our family, friends, and neighbors. Grasping onto this shared humanity is what will be needed as an important ingredient in our work together on the greatest humanitarian struggle this nation has ever faced and is finally positioned to grapple with.

Step 4: Replace Cancel Culture with Challenge Culture. Engage Passionately and Respectfully. But Engage.

These posts have been focused on the cold, gray space between the chaotic sparks of outrage and the steady hands of progress. So today I’m very conflicted, as I intended to write about the ills of ‘cancel culture’ (definition at the bottom of this post) and why we need to get rid of it.

As such, I wanted to talk about the nuances of CrossFit compared to Starbucks, Lady A(ntebellum) compared to the Dixie Chicks, the show Cops and the movie Gone With the Wind, and heck, I even wanted to hop in a time machine and revisit Paula Deen and Michael Richards (the zany and lovable Cosmo Kramer from Seinfeld).

I’m going to do my best to get there, but right now, in my bones, I’m tired and I’m really okay with some things being cancelled.

Below I present both rant and rationality.

Rant:

This morning when I woke up, I saw an article about Anthropologie and a disturbing history and ongoing system of racial profiling. And I got angry. I didn’t want to “Engage Respectfully” I wanted their empire toppled. I wanted every person I know to mass-return any purchases, I wanted accountability. I wanted people fired, and I wanted a personal apology for the moments over the years in which I shopped at that store for my wife, and suspected something peculiar was in the air. To be black in many American stores is to constantly walk a line between being gaslit that your feelings of perceived otherness and its effects on the behavior of employees is paranoia. As a quick anecdote of personal significance: Always conscious of this shopping-while-black phenomena, I recall my parents’ extreme hesitation in taking me to the high-end mall in Westchester as a teen when I needed my iMac fixed. They would quicker cross state lines to avoid and shield me from the glares I was sometimes blind to of patrons and employees alike. Alas, this newly revealed institutional horror from Anthropologie - this moment of validation by current and previous employees - was the final shingle I needed for my house of second-generation righteous indignation. Let’s cancel Anthropologie!

Between that moment (just a few hours ago) and this moment, I’ve seen news reports of Donald Trump’s upcoming insensitive, tone-deaf, and mid-pandemic dog-whistle of a rally on Juneteenth in Tulsa, the 60th anniversary of a horrible violent and fatal KKK rally. I’ve seen reports that citizens of Klamath Falls, Oregon armed themselves to the teeth to fight a fabricated enemy in Antifa who has been conflated for their purposes with BLM. I’ve seen articles outlining how an Ohio State Senator (AND PHYSICIAN) casually suggested poor hygiene habits of African Americans could be responsible for their increased incidents of Covid-19, which isn’t even a dog-whistle, it’s just synonyms for “Those n****ers don’t know how to wash their hands!” Mr. Senator, black people are dying from Covid for a handful of reasons - increased comorbidities and “essential worker” careers connected to socioeconomic factors inextricably linked to generations of systemic racism, but also in no small part because they can have biased, discriminatory doctors like you year-round, who studies have shown us are more likely to dismiss health concerns when they appear, and worse. Unlike many republicans consciously eschewing hand-washing as a solution (there’s a real study - go look it up) I assure you, this N**** knows how to wash his hands.

So there you have it: A snapshot of my pre-Noon passion and frustration.

Rationality:

Now, let’s put on our rational hats, even if those hats don’t feel like they fit in post-George Floyd America:

The bulk of what I just shared is information I was confronted with, and grappled with, in less than an hour. I shared my menagerie of feelings, frustrations, rage, confusion, hurt, validation, and the occasional glimmer of hope. But who on earth has time for all these feelings? In the famous words of Kimberly Wilkins, better known as Sweet Brown, “Ain’t NOBODY got time for that.”

That barrage of feelings were highly and directly correlated to a barrage of information. It’s my assertion that this is a key reason why Cancel Culture exists. In a world where we are inundated with information, from cable news, Facebook feeds, and annoying little news alerts on our phones, our dopamine levels are subjected to Mach-5 influxes of stories, and one of the best ways to deal with the things we find unsavory is to cancel them.

Yesterday, I said this post would be about how we overcome Cancel Culture and engage respectfully. In effect, my stance was going to be that we Cancel “Cancel Culture” - but I don’t really think that’s the move anymore. I think we overhaul it and we replace it with “Challenge Culture”. (This admittedly gets tricky because we’re talking about a sociological phenomenon but I am determined to stay focused on our individual actions - so below I’m talking about how we can each participate in challenge culture.)

My suggested mapping for this overhaul would look like this:

1.In the event that a grievous occurrence is revealed to us, we take a moment (or two!), own our feelings about it, even share that outrage with a friend or small collection of friends.
2. We check our sources and confirm this information has come from a reliable source. Pro tip: Check the dates of those sources too!
3. We involve ourselves in learning about what the organization or individual has done to address the grievance.
4. If we are not satisfied with this response, only at this point, do I suggest we join the “challenge” of this person or organization -- we leverage our networks to bring attention to the grievance.
5. We wait.
6. We check in hours, or days, later to see if we feel the issues have been appropriately addressed, either in the media or directly.
7. We decide with our wallets, votes, and other tools at our disposal the way forward.

It is in this way, that we can defuse our initial outrages, and ensure that when we do step up to speak, we are engaging in the most productive ways possible.

See you tomorrow for Step 5: Diversify Your News Consumption

***What is Cancel Culture?***

As a refresher, or introduction, here’s how cancel culture is defined in wikipedia: The act of canceling, also referred to as cancel culture (a variant on the term "callout culture") describes a form of boycott in which an individual (usually a celebrity) who has shared a questionable or controversial opinion, or has had behavior in their past that is perceived to be offensive recorded on social media, is "canceled"; they are ostracized and shunned by former friends, followers and supporters alike, leading to declines in any careers and fanbase the individual may have at any given time.” It's my view that cancel culture extends beyond individuals and can often include organizations and companies as well.

Step 3: Fiercely Monitor, Question, and Challenge Gatekeepers in Your Life and Network

“The Gatekeepers must change” - Prince.

Welcome! Without further ado: Step 3 (of 11): Fiercely Monitor, Question, and Challenge Gatekeepers in Your Life and Network

Yesterday, I talked about the important work of challenging and off-setting the racism and discriminatory behavior within each of us. Today, I want to talk about the most important people in our lives to engage on topics of race: The Gatekeepers.

American Racism is a big, messy, and horrible stain on society. It is the core hypocrisy of our great nation and the original ‘invisible enemy’ - predating Covid-19 by centuries. Yet, today we find ourselves in a flashpoint moment where we have a limited-but-real window to do more to unravel the threads of systemic discrimination that built our country than ever in my lifetime.

But how do we deal with things when they’re big and messy? An approach we’re all familiar with from our favorite television medical dramas is: Triage.

If my theory is correct, and we’re all walking around with latent biases, it is simply impossible to engage in meaningful conversations with everyone we know on these topics. Likewise, unless you are both hardwired to the same radio frequency (or cable news network), there is a chance for some uncomfortable daylight between your views and theirs.

Fortunately, we don’t have to engage with everyone on this in a meaningful way. Just like in a real or fictitious Emergency Room, where the person with the severed limb is treated before the person with a headache (right? as my friend Kellan will gladly remind you, I’m not a doctor), we can surgically select the most urgent people in our networks to check-in with. I call them The Gatekeepers.

For this conversation, let’s define gatekeepers as: Those in professions that frequently entrust them with the ability to directly impact the potential outcomes of others.

This includes educators, executive-assistants who control access to their bosses, record executives (as Prince did in the quote above), Police, loan-officers, politicians, and those with the ability to hire anyone for anything.

A main focus of our national conversation right now is on Police Brutality, and rightly so, as bias in their ranks too-often results in visible and tragically negative outcomes for Black citizens. But at the local level, we need to dig deeper and look further into the potential negative outcomes from all gatekeepers. As outlined in my anecdote from yesterday, even a gatekeeper with altruistic intentions can be an unwitting ‘asymptomatic super-spreader’ of bias.

If you are a gatekeeper yourself, do not shrink at my assertion that you can do better. In at least one way, big or small. Own that. Systemic racism is inherent in the system, but we are the people who make up these systems. We are the ones with the power for change. If every gatekeeper who sees this post or is confronted with the opportunity to change does nothing, nothing will change, and we’ll be having this conversation again 25 years from now.

So the task is this. Monitor the gatekeepers you know. Ask them about their day. Listen to their anecdotes about work, the people they interact with, the mundane and the exciting. But listen carefully. Listen when they talk about the people who annoy them, and why. Listen when they talk about that “at-risk” student, that entrepreneur who is just shy of deserving funding, the interviewee who was “just so urban.”

Question them. Ask questions as to the situations they encountered and how they handled them. Learn more about how they view their role in the lives of the people they are interacting with. By doing this, in addition to the benefits of just being a good friend or family member, you’ll be learning about how the individual levers of our systems and institutions function.

Challenge them. Ask them pointed questions. Ask them for stories from work that made them uncomfortable. Ask them for examples of times they regretted a decision they or a co-worker made. Ask them about times they think they may have read a situation wrong, or didn’t show the equality they may pride themselves in.

(Note, while challenging, now is not the time to be self-righteous. Stay productive, and keep in mind step one, ‘de-weaponizing words around race.’ By entrusting you with information about the inner workings of their profession and processes, they have created and expanded upon a vulnerability and bond with you. “Gemma, it sounds like you might be a racist!” will not do much to support or sustain that bond.)

It is when we understand and shift the behavior of our gatekeepers, introduce and remind them of the nuances that make them the final arbiters of racial justice, and participate in erasing unconscious bias from their ranks, that we can continue the march forward.

So, that’s all for today. See you tomorrow for:

Step 4: Abolish Cancel Culture. Engage Passionately and Respectfully. But Engage.

Step 2: Accept, Challenge, and Offset Your Own Racism

A few days ago, when I promised a list of 11 ways we can make meaningful change on Race in America, I honestly had no idea how time consuming and emotionally exhausting it would be thinking and writing about a list that came to me pretty quickly. Thank you again for all of your kind encouraging words and messages. On Monday, I talked about de-weaponizing words on race.

Today, I present:

Step Two: Accept, Challenge, and Offset Your Own Racism

I assure you I did my best to keep this short ;)

In step one, I suggested it’s important to eliminate the word “Racist” from our conversations, but that in no way means we should ignore the gravity of racial bias and discrimination. My hope is that right now, with a nation finally listening, we can take this opportunity to expand our views of what we define as racially-biased behavior, without the demoralizing weight of that word -- and start to correct it.

The age old saying is “50% of fixing a problem is acknowledging the problem exists.” Well -- we have a society where few want to be considered “Racists” yet discriminatory behavior continues. So it’s time we dig a little deeper.

Racism is so frequently dismissed as an overt action -- the use of the “N-word”, drawing swastikas, or explicitly stating David Duke- level biases. So society has told us that if we’re not personally responsible for using that word in mixed company, or encouraging the outright persecution and elimination of an entire race of people, we’re off the hook.

Well, not so fast.

Here in “Step Two” I want to suggest that we Accept, Challenge, and Offset our Own Racism. There will be plenty of steps where I talk about what to do about the racist neighbor, co-worker, teacher, etc. but that is useless if change doesn’t come first from within. Otherwise it makes us hypocrites, messengers who feel superior in our 'woke-ness', but without a core grasp of the depth and insidious nature of the problem we have to fix.

So today, let's talk about each individual one of us.

I define “Our Own Racism” as the conscious or unconscious thoughts we have, feelings (shared or unshared) we possess, and subsequent actions we take. My background in the field of social psychology gave me access to perspectives and information about how we perceive others I had no idea about before, and still to this day have trouble grasping now. Without dragging you through the details and nuances of that work, one thing we know this: we all (ALL) make judgments within the first 7 seconds of meeting someone. These aren’t always conscious judgements. They line up with what we’ve seen in the media, our own previous experiences, or our brain’s best guesses of who a person might be and what to expect.

I’ve been asked by a friend to make these posts more personal and less clinical, so here’s an anecdote: When I was starting middle school, my mother (who stayed highly-involved in my education) attended a meeting where she was learning about what us soon-to-be middle schoolers were going to experience. She went armed with a handful of inquiries for teachers and administrators as to what programs the ‘gifted’ students had to look forward to, how 'tracking' would factor into my life, how homework would impact my list of extracurriculars and more. She, however, was blind-sided by a teacher who pulled her aside before she could open her mouth, to assure her that our school had great resources for ‘at-risk’ students.

Here’s where my aforementioned ban of the word ‘Racist’ matters. Was that a racist incident? In my mind, unequivocally yes. Do you think that was a racist incident? Maybe. Did that teacher think she was being racist at that moment? I’m guessing she did not.

One anecdote, one word, a spectrum of perspectives.

Here’s a perspective I can state about this interaction, in an apolitical, clinical, and unemotional way: We have an educator, who saw the face of a concerned mom, approached her with the intent to reassure her that her child was going to be okay in the hands of his new school. If I editorialize for a moment, she probably even went home feeling like she was ‘one of the good ones’ - someone who made the effort at that gathering to reach out to a parent from the black community.
Here’s what I can also state about that interaction: A mother of a child who had shown academic promise went to learn about what would be done to foster that promise, and how she could work with that institution to protect it. She was confronted by an educator who saw her color, made countless assumptions about her child because of it, and inspired no confidence that her son would be seen as anything other than ‘at-risk’ by this teacher, her peers, and the institution tasks with furthering his development.

The heartbreaking disconnect of this moment is that it's still the world we still live in 25 years later. We each harbor biases that fuel so many of our interactions, and in moments where we may have the best conscious intentions, our unconscious mind can be hard at work, permanently breaking trust with those who look different from us.

When it comes to matters of race, it is time that we fuse our conscious and unconscious minds, accept our personal biases, no matter how small or large they may be, challenge ourselves through introspection on the ways in which we participate and have participated in this complex system, and start looking at ways to offset the damage we’ve done.

The only wrong answer in a time of tumultuous and overdue change is to stand still. The status quo isn’t just a cultural affliction, it’s a personal one.

My last point on this step is that it is important to offset this racism. How do we do this? I don’t pretend to have the answers. My inclination is that one step could be something similar to a retroactive carbon-offset, but for race. Did you not give Jamal a job because you didn’t think he’d fit in at your company? Did you not hire the black vendor for your wedding because as much as you liked their (cake/photos/floral arrangements) the vendor you actually went with had a kid on your kid’s soccer team? This carbon-offset approach consciously side-steps the murky political waters of Affirmative Action and Quotas, and is a more immediate and personal (and admittedly controversial) challenge to correct past grievances, and really examine the ways in which we hide our discomfort with race behind decisions like networking or perceived familiarity.

See you tomorrow for Step 3: Fiercely Challenge, Monitor, and Question Gatekeepers in your Life

A quick closing note: Some reading this might ask why I, as a Black American, have used the word “we” so often in a document that appears targeted to White America. I assure you, I’ve not forgotten how much melanin I have floating around in this body. My phrasing is hyper-intentional, as my research and self-examination have taught me I am not less likely to hold biases against people of color. My research showed when it comes to stereotypes and discriminatory behavior, black people are just as likely to harbor those views, even to the point where it can be self-detrimental in how we perform academically, and how we show up in the world. True story. So while white supremacy got us into this mess, it truly will take all of us to unravel it.

Step 1.5: Non-Binary, Nuanced Thinking

Before I outline the next official step; (Step 2 of 11) there is a concept that has been nagging me and I want to dig into with you as it is the unspoken underpinning of my whole list. I want to emphatically state my view is this:

We no longer live in a world where we can accept binary solutions and responses to the questions and dynamics that plague us. Full stop.

If a suggested solution is yes/no, up/down, off/on, right/left, then that solution has probably missed the point.

For example: Are Trump voters racists? Well… it’s complicated. No matter what your favorite news source tells you, there’s no simple answer to this question: There’s a non-negligible number of Trump supporters that voted for Obama - sometimes even twice. When pushed on their views on race, many will tell you they don’t see color, and will express outrage at the accusation they’re less than equitable in their views and actions. When confronted with the classically racist words and actions of their candidate-turned-President, many will make excuses, gaslight their questioner (and perhaps themselves) with ‘alternative facts’ that make whatever anecdote-in-question you’ve presented them with appear to be non-racially motivated, or deflect immediately to their views on his work elsewhere -- “But look at the economy!” In the rare case of accepting the underlying racism of a Trump administration action or policy, they will distance themselves from it, with a view of “well that’s him, that’s not me.” or “Well I don’t agree with him on everything.” So -- we have a situation where a large swath of the electorate *with no personal claims to racist intent* has empowered a leader who unapologetically fans flames of racism, re-tweets racist rhetoric, outrightly expresses his superiority to persons of color, and works hard behind the scenes to sure up the political and physical walls of white superiority.

Tricky, right?

I share this example not to exonerate liberal bias and discrimination, as it is as real and insidious as any other form, but only to commiserate and outline an experience I’ve had, and I’m sure some of you have had as well, countless times since election day on 2016 with good friends and good people who view things differently than me.

With the advent of technology, our brains are forced to process countless amounts of data, information, media... more than we were designed to handle. Quick decisions, quick categorizations, and swift information filing are the tools we use to survive and get from sunup to sundown. But how should we process information when society needs us not to ‘just survive’, but to thrive. What do we do when we recognize it’s time to watch and help our neighbors thrive as well?

One way is to take a step back, and look for *wisdom*. Think about every movie that has a wise elder character that the protagonist seeks advice from… I bet you’d be hard-pressed to find a (good) movie where that wise character suggests the obvious move. “Well..um… go kill the bad guy.” would NOT be in a script worthy of Oscar nods. Most always, there is a complexity, a nuance that hadn’t previously been considered, or some other complication that we need to get to the heart of.

So how do we fuse wisdom, an overwhelming influx of information, and the desire to do better for our neighbors?

I’m going to try to tackle that tomorrow in:

STEP TWO: Accept, Challenge, and Offset Your Own Racism

11 Things You Can Do RIGHT NOW to Improve The Obstacle of Race in America: STEP ONE: De-Weaponize The Language of Race

Thank you to everyone engaged in our current national push towards social justice for black citizens. Each of you who has thanked me for trying to express my thoughts, challenged me on my perspectives for being too conservative or too progressive (I’m truly honored I’ve been accused of both!), asked me what specific actions they can take right now to effect change, or just sent a DM to see how I’m handling and processing our current reality, thank you.

As promised, I’ve spent some time cobbling together my thoughts on our individual ways forward. I don’t pretend to be a fantastic or established voice of civil rights, I don’t pretend to have all the answers. As both disclaimer and perspective, my views are fused by having a complex connection to and relationship with black pain and suburban privilege, to have grown up on the outskirts of affluence, to have frequently challenged and confronted both liberal and conservative breeds of bias and discrimination to swim in Ivy League waters, and to have experienced the kindness and exceptionalism of high-quality police work, while having also experienced the powerlessness and fear that comes from baseless and racially-motivated police interactions.

Each day, I will share ONE bullet from the list, so we can digest and communicate. The list below is offered humbly. I hope that you, regardless of your color, station in life, or political affiliations, can find some value in the ideas presented. Don’t forget there are wonderful organizations doing fantastic work on these issues right now, and watching everything unfold these last few weeks has inspired me to possibly start my own -- more on that later... But no matter what you do, stay involved, stay engaged, and push for the equal America that is more possible today than ever in our history together.

*11 Things You Can Do RIGHT NOW to Improve The Obstacle of Race in America.*

STEP ONE: De-Weaponize The Language of Race

“You’re a racist.” “That was racist.” “He’s a racist!” There are few words in the English language that end a conversation faster than the word racist. People run to their respective corners, dismiss the accusations, defend the accused, grab their chips off the table and go home. Culturally, we’ve successfully created no safe-haven for the “racist”, while in practice, we let classically racist behavior flourish and reward it with raises, accolades, and election victories.

Fun exercise: Take a moment and ask yourself -- “Do I know any racists?” Really think. Maybe a few, maybe none come to mind. Maybe that one “crazy” uncle. Maybe that one lovable grandparent “who grew up in a different era.” But -- now, take a second moment and think of the dictionary definition of a racist : ‘A person who shows or feels discrimination or prejudice against people of other races, or who believes that a particular race is superior to another.’ My inclination is if we’re just checking boxes from that list the number of racists you know, by that definition, just went up. It comes uncomfortably close to home. Maybe it’s a sibling. Maybe it’s a friend from work. Maybe it’s elected officials -- maybe yet, it’s even an official you voted for.

So, what do we do with the dissonance between what we’ve thought of as the meaning of a word and the practical realities of that word? The same thing we do when a garden hose, a pair of shoes, or a paradigm no longer serve us. I suggest, simply, we throw it out.

(Note: this suggestion, and the bulk of this list, focuses on the individual level: the identification and observation of behaviors and actions of individual people, not on larger societal organizations, systems, or institutions.)

I suggest, instead, we take the word “Racist” and break it up. Into small, targeted, and specific words and phrases. How do we do that? Well, first we must take a quick but necessary detour:

A position that recent global protests suggests it’s long past time we adopt, regardless of how we personally feel about solutions to police brutality and governmental response to civil unrest, is that we can no longer pretend to live in an Obama-ordained, Pollyanna post-racial society. America was born a promising country rooted in white supremacy (inarguable, y’all) and today has hundreds of years of empirical data to support both its ongoing promise and the seemingly inescapable trappings of white supremacy. (Note: I recognize at least one of you winced at the phrase white supremacy, but let’s look at the definition: ‘the belief that white people are superior to those of all other races, especially the black race, and should therefore dominate society.’ If that’s not a pretty good definition of the mindset that welcomed, condoned, and aggressively enforced slavery -- I don’t know what is).

So that’s our problem - we have these words to describe things that we think we’re personally above - that our friends and neighbors are above. And if we keep thinking that, black lives are doomed.

In a nation that is not post-racial, and is “unconsciously discriminatory”, I argue that we all need to chose our “conscious” sides. If racism is the status quo, we get to actively pick who we will be and who we will show up as: The question is will we be Agents of Racial Bias or Agents of Racial Change?

Will our actions fuel, even in small ways, discrimination? Will we refuse to challenge the status quo and turn a blind eye to the cries of black voices familiar and unfamiliar? Will we do nothing? If so, we have made the active choice to be an Agent of Racial Bias.

On the other hand, will we challenge our biases, will we challenge our neighbors and friends in their big and small moments of active bias? Will we do the work to be uncomfortable in a society that has made us complacent with dog whistles, apologists for our leaders, and in so many ways blind to the journey of our fellow citizens with different color skin? If so, we have made the active choice to be an Agent of Racial Change.

Between Rocks and the Hard Place

"The child who is not embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth" - African proverb.

In another effort to leverage the beauty of facts, I'd like to point out the deeply racist roots of the chestnut shared by our President on Twitter yesterday: "Once the looting starts, the shooting starts" -- that phrase came from a violently racist police chief in Miami, Walter Headley, who was on the wrong side of the civil rights movement. Bravo to Twitter for taking a stand against this glorification of violence.

So, anyone who watched the President's birther movement conspiracies or his injecting himself into the wrongful prosecution of the Central Park Five and decided he wasn't racist -- cool -- just make sure you're watching today. Maybe you don't believe his ex-wife Ivana's claims that he kept and read a book of Hitler's speeches next to his bed. But look at the playbook he's using now. He's not using the healing words of Martin Luther King Jr., he's not looking to cobble together creative thoughts of his own. A man who looked at the murderous intention and execution by white nationalists in Charlottesville (the turning point that motivated Joe Biden to run), and saw "Good People on Both Sides" - the President that publicly supported and encouraged the armed and dangerous protests of his supporters in Michigan - now sees an opportunity to conflate the same rage and frustration fueling Minneapolis citizens to both peaceful and riotous actions into one bucket of "Thugs".

I have a bunch of friends on here who are conservatives. I love you guys. Honestly, I do. I've made friends who are amazing members of their local police forces. I am so grateful they wake up everyday, put themselves in harms way, and keep their communities safe. But we gotta do better. Over the last decade, the Republican Party has increasingly become a safe space for dangerous and racist thought and policy. Over the course of American history, the Police have been a pawn in the militarized and systemic surveillance, incarceration, and extermination of black skin.

While a handful of you have reached out to me encouraging me to separate my fear and frustration from politics, I hope you can see how dangerously interlinked they are by the responses or lack there of we've seen so far from Government, from on the ground in Minneapolis all the way up to the White House. My post from earlier this week calmly called on the right to philosophize a way they can be part of the solution. In a nation of such abundance, there shouldn't be the need for your rights to vote to protect your wallet or your political interests to be diametrically opposed to my right to walk down the street without an increasing fear of each siren.

So, friends on the right, it is time to stand up and pledge your allegiance to the extraction of hate from your ranks. It is time to denounce our racist in chief. Loudly. Now.

Time is running out to truly be considered an ally, or in any way not an active and unmoving part of the problem as an overwhelming influx of media, 911 calls, and kaleidoscopic multi-angle video of black extermination flood the internet.

Friends on the left, continue to challenge your deeply held beliefs and biases. Talk to your friends, of all creeds and colors, and question what is happening. The liberal friend who posts a 1/2 dozen heartfelt drawings of George Floyd and "Justice for George Floyd" posts and does nothing else is the new version of conservative "Thoughts and Prayers" after mass shootings.

In a ten minute video, we all watched the execution of an American citizen. No less fatal than the beheadings of Isis, no less tragic for the friends and family of the murdered.

We've seen the action. Now it's time for the organized and decisive reaction. I'm not saying it's a time for violence or unchecked rage. But I understand it. Chaos loves a vacuum and in the absence of clear leadership and clear action, it will not stop. It can't. Because we're heartbroken, we're afraid, and we feel weight of the powder keg that is living as a black American in 2020. As economic, political, and societal rocks stack up around us, we are stuck between those rocks and the hard place.